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Newswire

Praise for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

The reviews from yesterday’s primary elections are in and praise for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s stunning upset are through the roof among establishment hacks who couldn’t be arsed to learn her name till just yesterday.

We begin with Nancy Pelosi who just a few days ago was reciting manifest destiny at Maxine Waters like some hobbyist colonizer:

This was definitely drafted with a Crowley win in mind and honestly it rules that her office was too flummoxed to rewrite the whole thing. Then there’s this a few hours later:

Next we have this lanyard-wearing dipshit calling himself Ben Ritz, known colloquially around here as a headass:

Get rekt, binch!

Here we see Amanda Marcotte coming through with the clutch take that Ocasio’s win is actually a sign that dems want more of Pelosi:

Finger on the pulse, this one.

Any list like this wouldn’t be complete without the inclusion of time-crime victim and political journalist Joy Reid:

You better believe Smooth Brain has his own volley of takes to add to the mix:

Gus_802 having a normal one:

This headass:

This one too:

Palmer Report having a normal one:

To close this out, the candidate in her own words: